Smile

I come to you with a heavy heart
I come with all my burdens
Burdens of past hurts
A pot full of disappointments
A tray with an array of lost battles
I try, I fail
I give, I do not receive
I ask, I get nothing
Fragile little me
Now a bottle of broken pieces
All I ask is for you to fix me
 
She said ....
Smile though your heart is aching
Smile even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll see the sun come shining through for you

Smile?
My face hits the ground
My teeth bites the dust
A smile would be deception
A smile is near impossible
Stormy weather, grey skies
Earthquakes and Hurricanes
Fear and Confusion
Now my only cup of tea
The next step, a strategy
I have no clue
The meaning of life, I seek


She said ....
Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile

Smile?
When my tears are my only companion
My solitude, my only solace
Humph! Some solace!
Perhaps, a new refuge I must seek
To trudge on, I must
For any day soon all shall be well
All shall be well?
Oh, reason to smile
I try, I give, I ask .. I trust
Any day soon
What will be, will be
For now, I smile 

You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile 

Sending some sunshine your way. :-) If you're feeling down and blue, remember that there are better days ahead .... this too shall pass, Amen. Just keep on keeping on and smile, even when your life feels like shit. Smile, because no situation is permanent. Smile, because its good for your face :-) Smile because I said so. hehehe. Oh, and smile so that your enemies will be shy (my aunt told me that one). So, ya, I'm sending a smile your way. kisses, peace & love. keep praying.
~ Inspired by smile - Nat King Cole

Was supposed to post this earlier on in the year, din get round to doing it.

Ultimate Loser

They say its never about who wins or loses

Its about being able to take the risk

Hoping for the best and learning from the worst

That's what they say

You said it wasn't a game
It was never about who won or lost
You never meant to take me for a ride
Yet you did

I said I could handle whatever the outcome was
I did not know what I was in for
They say its never about who wins or loses
But what do I do when I've lost everything?

When my feelings have not changed
When your feelings are all over the place
When you are the one who makes me happy
How am I not the loser?

They say, 'No worries. Its his loss'
How is it 'his loss' when I am the only one who suffers?
They say a lot of things
Yet they do nothing

They say its all about what happens next
How I cope and what I do
What if I don't want to cope
What if I want to fight for you ... still

But I was never a fighter
.. And which fool fights for what is not theirs?
For me, its now or never ...
So that is a question you need to answer ... again

I am tired of playing games with you
For I'm the only one who loses

Inspired by the phrase 'Ultimate loser', and some movie i watched, can't remember what its called though.

*** Hey people! I need a favor. Can you lemme know which two or three posts you love the most (on this blog)? I need to email like 2 poems to a poetry professor in my school, and appeal for him to let me into his class... and I dunno which ones to send. I'm not an English major, and I'm graduating this semester, so he being all long tin about it...ahiaa for me not being an English major, eh? Lemme know your suggestions in your comments, ok. Thanks Loves.

Great Expectations (All Talk, No Action)

'.. Addiction to this medicine is common, don't be ashamed. And if you feel a lil woozy after this just hold my hand. And I can numb yo whole body like Novocain. I can make you come back, you can can call me cocaine.' - Plies (Medicine)


'.. Call me Mr. Shoe Shine, baby amma polish ya, and I'll leave you spit clean, I dun use no polisher. Demolition man, tell your friends I demolish ya..'  Juelz Santana (Rocking that thang remix)


'.. Tell me what you will do. Tell me what you won't do. Tell me what you dunno how to do so I can show you. Imma give it to you, give it to you like I owe you, and after i'm done, amma tell you that I told you!' Juelz Santana (Back to the crib)


                  'Cos you keep telling me this and telling me that. You say once I'm with you I'll never go  back. You say there's a lesson that you wanna teach. Well, here I am baby, Practice what you preach' Barry White (Practice What You Preach)

Said he would take me to a place far beyond, in whole other galaxy

Travel in my mind and explore my sexuality

Melt my imagination and mold it into reality

Said he could be my insulin

Once I had a dose of him, I'd think he was my medicine

Said to call him Mr.Flintstone, cos he could make my bedrock

So naturally I took him up on his offer

With great expectations, thought he would rock my world

Thought he would keep it hot like a thermos cup

Was looking for a true nerd with the brain of a god

But 'The Inventor' invented a can of worms. WTH

Mr. Backfire, worse than anything on FailBlog. FML

So now my attitude is virgin, I dun give an F.

Some might find this a tad offensive, or raw..sorry. Twas by popular request, so decided to try something new. Apparently, there are a lot of 'All talk, no action' men around leaving women speechless (not in a good way). I'm just amused. But yeah, guys talk a lot, and brag a lot about their 'sexual prowess', or try way to hard to be superman and ish in bed and then it totally backfires. 

While we're on this topic, I have a question. Why is it that guys back at home assume that because you are home for vacation, you're looking for some christmas romping shop time. Its interesting. I remember one dude I saw at Twist (a popular hangout spot at Labone, Accra) was like 'Oh you can really dance. Can you dance as well in bed'..I was shocked saf, I couldn't even talk, and he was like .. he wonders what I can show him, and something about how he can hit it right. So direct! So cocky! I was too shocked. I din know him from Adam. So I was like ...humph, well I won't bang him but I can leave him thinking I did (smh. What? Abi we are all talking shit here.. I swear, only people with diseases do these things oh. If a guy ever comes on that strong, RUN!!! lol) ..then I just left him on the dance floor. What kinda rubbish is that? SMH. Talk about a big ego. I'm sure nothing give am too.

* Inspired by random stories that made me LOL

  Inspired by dem cocky guys who always feel the need to brag, got me thinking 'ah, but this guy! No one has asked you anything.' Just puts me off, totally.

  Inspired by Luda, Lil Wayne, Juelz, Barry, Trey, Keri. By the way, my jam of the week is 'Medicine - Plies ft. Keri Hilson'. Amusing, but the beginning foncall bit was unnecessary and wack though. lol

Tears in Heaven

Would you know my name

If I saw you in heaven

Will it be the same

If I saw you in heaven

I must be strong, and carry on

Cos I know, I don't belong

Here in heaven

Heaven

In your heaven

You've got me trapped

You, my master

Me, your slave

Infinite stupidity

The story of my life

I think about what we have

A pile of nothingness

I ask you, omnipotent one

I ask, who am I?

I ask, who are you?

I ask, what are we?

The silence speaks volumes

For I mean nothing

.. am nothing.. to you

Yet you trap me

In your heaven

Would you hold my hand

If I saw you in heaven

Would you help me stand

If I saw you in heaven

I'll find my way, through night and day

Cos I know, I just can't stay

Here in Heaven

Promises

All empty

Empty barrel

Why do you remain silent?

When I ask, Omniscient one

Where are we heading?

Or why do you do the things you do?

I guess you feel no need for noise

Empty! Empty! Empty Barrel!

Yet you've got me trapped

In what I thought was heaven

Trapped in your web

An intricately woven web of bullshit

And though it stinks as hell

I'm trapped here in your heaven

Clearly a dilemma

For being trapped means suffocating

Being trapped means death

See, I just can't stay

I don't belong

Time can bring you down

Time can bend your knee

Time can break your heart

Have you begging please

Begging ... please ... 

For you I've shed many a tear

I've begged and I've pleaded

My knees are weak

My heart is bleeding

So out the door I go

I'll miss the laughter

I'll miss your touch

I'll miss the good stuff

But you have a wicked heart

In your heaven, I am nothing

For every smile, for every laugh

I cried ten times more

For every caress, for every kiss

You pushed me and crushed me

ten times more, ten times harder

So I cannot shed another tear

Not for you, or anybody

For I know

I don't belong

In this heaven

Beyond the door

There's peace I'm sure

And I know, there'll be no more

Tears in heaven

Yet its hard not to cry

When I'm not sure what exactly is outside

But it must be better than this hellish heaven

Outside heaven, there is light

Outside heaven, there is hope

The irony of it all

So I walk towards the door

Not looking back

Still teary eyed

Sad, yet hopeful

Angry as hell

Out of your heaven

Hope it gives you hell!

Cos I know, I don't belong

Here in heaven

And I know , there'll be no more

Tears in heaven

~ Inspired by Eric Clapton. Not quite sure this is what he had in mind though.

The Wait

TICK

TOCK
The clock ticks.. seconds to minutes
minutes to hours.. hours to days
days turn to months.. months.. months

I watch the sands of time slip through my fingers
Wishing you were back here with me
Just so I could see you smile.. laugh.. sing.. dance
In due time.. I keep telling myself
You'll be back where you belong, in my arms
So patiently I wait

I'll be waiting 

Cos I can't smile until I see your smile

I'll be waiting

There's nothing else that I would rather do

I'll be waiting

Cos I can't sleep until I hear your heart

I'll be waiting

Patiently I'll wait right here for you

TICK

TOCK

I resent the distance, I resent the time
Yet as I watch the minutes slip through my fingers
I realize I'm a minute closer to your touch
Your breath.. Your warmth.. Your heart..
For what we share transcends both time and space
Like time, this thing we share is irreversible
And you, my dear, are irreplaceable
So I wait, for in due time
You'll be back in my arms

I don't care how long it takes

I don't mind, I'm alright, I'll sit and wait

Till the sun goes down 

And comes back up again

You're the best thing in my life

Without you it just ain't right

So take as long as you like

I'm Waiting

TICK

TOCK

Waiting ... Waiting ... Waiting ... Waiting

Patiently I'll wait right here for you

TICK

TOCK

Cos I can't smile until I see your smile

Cos I can't sleep until I hear your heart

TICK

TOCK

So patiently I'll wait right here for you

Waiting ... Waiting ... Waiting ... Waiting

Gloomy future without you

There is only one you

So ever so patiently
I wait

~ For Amariee ... hope you love it.

~ Also, for all others in long distance relationships, or temporarily away from their significant others and special people.

~ Inspired by a lot of things but mainly Beyonce's new song 'Waiting'. I've properly killed that song, even my dog, Whisky can bark that song. hahaha!

Brand New Heat ... The Drought is over

'Riding round the city with some brand new heat. ... I'm cold like a midnight in Aspen. I am the president and the assasin. Cameras on, big lights, Action. Welcome to the show, I'm the main attraction.'

HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE!!!

So, I've been doing a lot of thinking about what lies ahead, and what my New Years Resolutions are. There are a few things I need to work on. These include:

1. My Friends -- Some people jus gotta go, for real. I'm sorting out the grain from the chaff.

2. Career plans -- I'm not ready for grad school. I know that for a fact. lol..now isn't that a start?

3.  Men -- Undecided. Cautious Optimism vs. Pessimism ..dunno.. all I know is I dun want no stress and pimples. I won't lie, i'm more inclined towards pessimism chale. The lies, the deceit, the selfishness, hot-and-cold, the bullshit.. i'm allergic chale..pimples! lol

4.  My mum -- More serious talk, less kokonsa.

5. My spiritual life -- Which I should have put as number one. I'm shy. Anyway, about that ... more prayer, more quiet time, doing more for God.. hopefully see the path set out for me, and walk the walk.

6. Continue to love unconditionally, and give freely. It kinda contradicts (1). But trust, they r two different things. I just don't want people taking advantage of me, cos I feel like all my life i've let things slide, put up with a lot of rubbish in the name of God and in the name of being nice.

7. Decisions -- Hopefully I make the right ones (ideally), because I do not always learn from my mistakes (Can I get a 'me too'?). I ask for Gods guidance. .. but if I do make mistakes, I hope I learn.

8.  Explore my creative side. Start designing clothes again. Write a book. I have a feeling I'll have ample time to do that after graduation.

9. Become Chief Driver. Haha

10. Stop being sorry for people and do more to help them. Start an NGO or something. I'm still thinking about where exactly, I'm going to focus on.

11. I think I'm the laziest, most unfocused person I know chale. Changes need to be made.

12. I think I want to do a lot of crazy fun stuff this year, and take more risks... not absolutely ridiculous and stupid ones though. More vacations an tins.

13. This year, I'm hopeful. I'm happy. I'm blessed, and I'm exploring endless opportunities. I'm taking leaps of faith ... Brand new heat!! Shels is going hard!!

BIG DREAMS, HUH, BIG DREAMS..WE'LL SEE HOW IT GOES.

HOPE U ALL HAVE AN AMAZING YEAR... AND PLENTY TO BE THANKFUL FOR. AMEN!